Breathing: at 1/2 liter per minute at 25-30% oxygen
Milestones: We participated in Lydia's bath for the first time! (the nurses have always done it without us before), Thomas got to feed her a bottle!, Lydia got 34 mls from me which is 77% of her feeding, Lydia is more awake and alert when feeding time comes
Thoughts: The alarm that goes off when a brady happens is my least favorite sound. The other night, it went off 8 times. Only one was a real brady and the rest were just the probe not picking up her heart rate, but it still stressed me out. Every time I hear the sound my heart aches. Lydia has to go 7 days with no bradies before she can come home. Every time that alarm goes off, it means at least another 7 days.
I love the nurses at the hospital, but some times... Lydia had a brady and was bringing her oxygen sats back up. I was holding her and the nurse said she needed to take her to help calm her down. Are you for real? I can rub my baby's back just as well as anyone. I am the mom. I am supposed to be able to calm and comfort my child. It is my duty to my baby girl. When she took Lydia from me it was like she ripped a piece of me away. I understand if Lydia was blue or not breathing, but she looked fine. Her oxygen was a little low, but its nothing we haven't seen before. It is hard to get new nurses that don't know that we know what we are doing. I can't say I am better than them at their job, but I am Lydia's mom. I can take care of her pretty well.
I can't believe it's been 8 weeks. It has been a looong 8 weeks, but I am so proud of Lydia. She has done amazingly well and is progressing so much! I was looking at pictures from her first weeks and it is incredible how much she has changed. She is doing so well all things considering. It is sometimes disheartening to see her struggling with certain things, but I just have to remember how far she has come. She is amazing and such a fighter. We are so blessed to have her.
We had family home evening earlier this week. It was awesome, but something was missing- our daughter. Is it really family home evening if you don't have your whole family? I think we will have part of our FHE at the hospital from now on.
Trials are part of life. I have been through many. It is amazing how you learn something new from each and every one. I am grateful for the trials I have been through. They have made me who I am. They have strengthened my testimony and made me a strong person. They have made me empathetic to others and made it to where I can help others as they suffer through their own trials.
I am so grateful for the Gospel. I love the temple and the peace and comfort that comes from attending it. I am grateful that we are not alone as we pass through this life. I would never be able to make it through this without my amazing husband and my Heavenly Father. The NICU is a sad place. Most parents there look so sad. Since day 1, Thomas and I are usually smiling and happy when visiting the NICU because we know how blessed we are. We have an incredibly cute daughter that we love more than words can express. We know she will be with us for eternity and THAT is amazing. I am so glad that I NEVER have to worry about never seeing my daughter again. The plan of salvation is such a blessing.
This post has kind of been all over the place. Most likely because my mind is all over the place. I could blame it on lack of sleep or stress, but it's just the way I am! I am so grateful for my family. Thomas has referred to the three of us as BFFs- Best family forever!!!
Grandmother gave us these booties. They are hanging in our car so we take Lydia with us everywhere we go.
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